New answers tagged politeness
-2
Since「するように」and「あるように」are valid, I guess you are talking about the -です form.
The word before 〜ように should be in 連体形.
However, です's 連体形 are only used before ので or のに.
I think there are no logical explanation for this.
4
If you are working and they are a customer, then お[客]{きゃく}さま is a pretty normal way to refer to someone.
Also in many contexts,
お[兄]{にい}さん
お[姉]{ねえ}さん
お[父]{とう}さん
お[母]{かあ}さん
おじさん
おばさん
おじいさん
おばあさん
function as ways to address people when you don't know depending on the person's age.
But perhaps the most common way to get someone's attention is すみません ...
1
At the very simplest level, regardless of whether talking about your own or others' actions, it is best to stick to ます・です style if you want to be polite.
It does not sound stuck up if the politeness is appropriate, but it might sound distant (so, potentially aloof/stuck up as a result?) if you (continually) use it when speaking to friends.
That said, it ...
2
First of all, I appreciate that this is a difficult subject, not least because when trying to research it, in English, the terms "honorifics" "respectfulness" "formality" "politeness" etc. often get used differently by different people. I'll try to stick to your terminology, but apologies if I slip up!
Your understanding is correct: you can't combine "...
4
The first strategy is avoidance. No word for "you" is needed in either of your examples: ご存知ですか。〇〇さんですか。
In other cases, the prefix 御 (お or ご) serves instead. ご出身は？お子さんが素敵ですね！
In very rare cases where you actually do need to address someone, if you're being formal, そちら can be used in some cases (especially in contrast with oneself - like "and what about ...
2
As you mentioned, 無理 is bit too straight and I would avoid using it in a conversation with a teacher. I think your first phrase,
んん、私はそのような事があまり得意じゃないから、それはちょっと…。すみません。
sounds more polite. Although this phrase is fine in a spoken language, it is bit too vague in a text/email message. I would use 遠慮 instead of 無理 and say something like「誘っていただきありがとうございます。...
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