This is MC's thought about a girl who's sitting next to him, but she's still keeping a distance with him.

This is hard for me to understand, so much thanks if anyone can help me understand what he has been thinking here o/ (the last part ...結構堪える)

(Did she hate me that much ...)

(She's very cute, and was friendly at first though....??)

  • 2
    Your writing style is quite familiar.
    – Jimmy Yang
    Commented Mar 12, 2022 at 9:14

1 Answer 1


This 堪える is read こたえる. In this context, it means "this is tough", "it saddens me", etc.


2 外からの刺激を身に強く感じる。「寒さが骨身に―・える」「父の死が―・えた」



(Source: 明鏡国語辞典(第三版))


  1. to affect; to take a toll; to strike home; to have an effect on; to be hard on someone (e.g. heat, cold, work, illness, etc.); to be a strain​ See also 堪える, sometimes 堪える

As those entries suggest, the correct kanji for this meaning is 応える, not 堪える. But this "misuse" of 堪える is common, and we may have to accept this.

堪える is also read as こらえる and たえる, in which case it only means "to endure".

  • Oh I read it wrong too (as kekkou + koraeru ). So he can't bear the thinking inside his mind that she maybe hated him >> that pain/hurts him quite a lot . I got it now o/
    – 4chan user
    Commented Mar 12, 2022 at 17:21

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