Kazuka is wondering about if she caused a curse to happen to her mother by burning the snake eggs. I understand the general meaning but the suffix "mai" confuses me a little bit.
It's a suffix used to convey a negative meaning, right? ie. 'probably isn't' or 'musn't'. But here, it is challenging for me to understand why the author used it. It feels like it weakens the possibility of Kazuka harming her mother, but we know that she is anxious about her actions. Or is it used here to strengthen the if clause?
This is "The Setting Sun" by Osamu Dazai by the way.