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I was at Japanese class today and I heard these phrases while I was listening to chokai:

休んでくれますか (Can you give me the favour of resting for today) 休ませてもらいませんか (Can you let me rest for today?) 休んでもらいますか (Can I receive the favour of resting for today?)

From my understanding, these phrases mean the same thing (Translation as per my understanding as of above). However, I was told by my japanese teacher that they all mean different things but I could not understand his explanation on why they were different. Can anyone explain why they are different in all 3 cases?

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  • 休んでくれませんか is more like won't you rest?

  • 休ませてもらえますか is like could you let me rest?

  • 休んでもらえますか is like could I have you take the day off?

くれる is used when something is done in your/your party's favor. More specifically, it is attached to the verb that someone else does for you. For example, マイケルは(私に）ペンを貸してくれた。

もらう is used to describe your party receiving an action from someone else, using the same example, 私はマイケルにペンを貸してもらった。

In the case of ～させてもらう, させて indicates some sort of allowance/permission, and もらう indicates that you are the subject that is receiving the permission. Thus, 休ませてもらえますか literally means "Could (you) allow (me) to rest?"

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