Let's say I've just been food shopping with my girlfriend and I want to say "give me the bag" so that I can carry it for her. Could I just use 「くれて」, or would I use something else?

  • Why would you use 「くれて」 at all? It is ungrammatical and it makes no sense. Mar 27 '18 at 0:12
  • 2
    Well, I don't know, do I? Hence the question. I've heard that 頂戴 sounds childish or feminine, so I thought that one may be able to say 「それをくれて」or something, seeing as thought it essentially means "to give", but perhaps it can only be used in statements and not commands.
    – nehry
    Mar 27 '18 at 2:02
  • 2
    Command with te form is brought through omission from polite request …てください. In this regard, however, that of くれる is not くれてください but ください. That's why くれて doesn't function as command.
    – user4092
    Mar 27 '18 at 6:07

Since you are trying to take over a heavy bag from your wife, I'd think more appropriate expressions are:

  • バッグ (bag): combined with a hand gesture, just saying "bag", maybe just , or even not saying anything at all, communicates the right message. I prefer this the best, because the terseness shows that you and she are on the same wave length that doesn't nee too many words, which is generally seen as a sign of a long intimate relationship. otherwise known as 阿吽(あうん)の呼吸
  • 持つよ ([I will] carry [it]) 頂戴(ちょうだい) (pass [it to me]): similar terse forms that just uses a verb and omits everything else. This works, too.
  • 下さい (please give [it to me]): a slightly formal word like this, when combined with exaggerated intonation, can add playfulness.

I don't think くれて in a grammatically correct Japanese in this context, though there's くれてやって/くれてやんな, which is more blunt/aggressive form that translates to something like "just give it up already"


You could use (please give me)


object + を + ください

Eg ... (please may i have that)



if you're shopping and you want to ask waiter to show something you want,

You can use



For example:




if you want to say give me the bag in japanese when you're shopping.

You can just say


in your sentence.

you also can take a look into other questions already asked and their answers in Stackexchange.

How to actually order fast food?

Why is 翼をください translated as "Please give me wings"?


I understand that you are asking for a casual command form, but I have found the expression

持とうか / 持ちましょうか

to be the most useful because you can confirm that they want you to carry it by just saying this first, or you can assume they want you to by saying this while reaching for the bag.

In the context of carrying a bag for a girlfriend, I don't see why ください or any variation of it would be necessary if spoken with normal tone (i.e., excluding the usage Kawaguchiさん describes).


You can simply say "name of an object" + 「頂戴」 in such case (for example, 「ボールペン頂戴」 if you want her to give you a pen). This sounds friendly and informal, but still not rude.

  • 5
    You can also say 「〜かして」, also friendly and informal, but not rude.
    – user19929
    Mar 26 '18 at 10:39

Well, I guess the most "normal" saying is that you say something like:

xをください xをお願いします

But what I usually say with my wife (日本人) is something along the lines of:


I know it's probably not the best and most accurate saying, since it also changes with the social relation of the speaker/listener, but this was always understandable for all 日本人 I talked to (her parents, only know 日本語, relatives, etc.)

  • ~を(自分に)あげてください is not right at all. Probably being "nice" by not correcting you because they understand what you want to say. It seems like everyone goes through that :)
    – By137
    Jun 25 '18 at 6:37

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