Trying to say something like this line:

I am not wanted.

But for all the Japanese language likes skipping subjects and topics, I can't seem to find an equivalent for this case--it seems like the only way to say this is by rephrasing it to "X doesn't want me" (Xは私をいらない). The closest I can think of is 自分が必要とされていない, but I don't want to say "I'm not needed", I want to say "I'm not wanted". It doesn't seem like conjugating いる or ほしい is the way to go either. How can I say this without adding a topic?

※Disclaimer: This is not related to how I actually feel.

  • 1
    Perhaps you could clarify in what way you mean wanted - romantically, as part of a team, as company, for a specific request, etc. I would imagine the translation would be different depending on how you intend this word.
    – Robert
    Oct 1, 2017 at 10:43
  • @Robert It would be 'in general' technically--not wanted by anyone or for anything, unwanted as a person. Essentially I want to leave it as open/all-encompassing as it is in English. If that isn't possible however, then it would be in the sense of a child being unwanted by their parents (or whatever else is closest to being all-encompassing).
    – idlackage
    Oct 1, 2017 at 18:48
  • @idlackage I'm a bit amused by the need to put the disclaimer.
    – keithmaxx
    Oct 2, 2017 at 1:22

1 Answer 1


I think you're looking for

私は求められていない(よう)です。 (It seems) I am not wanted/needed.

The line between need and want case is a blur (I'd say the same in English), but the word does express a nuance of being unwanted.

Then again, I imagine the Japanese don't say this out loud often because it also expresses some resentment (of being unwanted by the listeners, perhaps).

Edit: To say it more emphatically you could say,

私は誰にも求められていません。 Nobody wants/needs me.

Of course you can outright point out just who is making you feel unwelcome or unwanted, and that will border on being antagonistic.

  • Thank you. If google isn't lying to me, is this kind of a soft way to put it (even without the よう)? Would there also be a way to put this more bluntly/harshly? (Kind of like using いらない)
    – idlackage
    Oct 2, 2017 at 3:08
  • @idlackage Neither are softer or harsher than each other.
    – user4092
    Oct 2, 2017 at 12:04
  • I would think that expressing ambivalence or ignorance for someone's presence is already harsh for Japanese... they are a community-based society, after all.
    – keithmaxx
    Oct 3, 2017 at 6:02
  • @keithmaxx Sorry for more questions but I just realized that I should've put in a lot more context than I did. What I was looking for was what someone would think in their head--they aren't saying this out loud, they're just alone sulking to themselves. Which is what I meant with いらない--like if someone asked whether you'd like a bag at the supermarket even いりません is kind of cold, so you'd say something like 大丈夫です. I would like to know if 求められていない would work as something someone (who is angry/sad about being unwanted) would think to themselves.
    – idlackage
    Oct 3, 2017 at 21:30

You must log in to answer this question.

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged .