What's the difference between these words? I read a lot of explanations in various books but they aren't clear for me. It says that depending on the object distance, the first, second or third needs to be used. But what does this "distance" mean? I cannot understand when I need to use them.
When the speaker is nearer to the thing than the listener, or when the speaker is as near as the listener, これ is used.
When the listener is nearer than the speaker, or when only the listener is having experience of the thing, それ is used.
Neither is near, あれ is used.
Even if both the speaker and the listener are near to the thing, the speaker can't use これ when the thing is the listener's.
However, if you are using or borrowing the listener's item, you use これ, like この車いいですね.
It means that the speaker should use それ when only the listener is using or borrowing the speaker's item and the speaker is just looking at the listener.