Particle に when related to state and how to recognize a verb as a state

Question

While looking at the examples of ている form and usage in my textbook I came across this sentence

かぞくは とうきょうに すんでいます
My family lives in Tokyo.

I know from what I've been reading on the internet that that the verb here is a state and that the に here marks the location that the state is taking place in. Basically I'm wondering when a verb can or can't be a state. All the examples I've seen have used ている form with に to make sentences like this which makes sense but it makes me question my placement of the the particle で in some of the ている practice sentences I made like this one.

みちこさんは バスていで バスを まっています
Michiko is waiting for the bus at the bus stop

Any help/explanation with this is appreciated and If Its unclear what I'm asking say in the comments and I'll try to add to the question.

Answer 1

The problem is that 住{す}む does not translate well to English. In Japanese, 住{す}む behaves like a motion verb taking a destination, like 行{い}く and 入{はい}る. Unfortunately "I live to Tokyo" doesn't make sense in English.

Maybe 住{す}む will make more sense if we compare it to a motion verb:

室内{しつない}に入{はい}る。
I go inside.

室内{しつない}に入{はい}っている。
I am inside.

入{はい}る is the changing state of going into (に) something. When you conjugate it to 入{はい}っている, it shows that you are in the state resulting from that action.

(You might have learned that verb+ている means "to be (verb)ing," which it can also mean. It depends on the verb, and to a lesser extent the context.)

Here is another example to emphasize how ~ている can be equivalent to English present tense, although in this case it is usually abbreviated to just ~てる.

君{きみ}を愛{あい}する
I love you.

君{きみ}を愛{あい}してる。
I am (in the state of) loving you. (I am in love with you.)

From a Japanese perspective, "I love you" doesn't sound very immediate or permanent, so they use "I am in love with you" when in English we use "I love you."

So a more accurate translation of 「東京{とうきょう}に住{す}んでいる」 is "I am living in Tokyo," even though in English that means the same thing as "I live in Tokyo." Just keep in mind that 住{す}む uses に like a motion verb and conjugates to 住{す}んでいる to show the persistent state.

Answer 2

The fundamental difference between 〜で and 〜に is that the former is an adjunct (can be removed from the clause) while the latter is an argument (cannot be removed from the clause). Unfortunately, this is made hard to understand by the fact that arguments can be omitted in Japanese (even though they are still in the clause, inferred).

However, this explanation does not explain how to pick whether to use 〜で or 〜に for a given verb. That's because there exists no such explanation. You just need to memorize it. In other words, it's part of the verb's meaning.

Some examples will help:

• ○彼は生{い}きています。
  ×彼は住{す}んでいます。

  生きる means "to live" while 住む means "to live in"/"to live at"/"to reside in". Similarly, you can't say "He is residing" in English -- it needs the argument. Hence, you use 〜で生きる and 〜に住む: 「残酷な世界で生きていく。」「東京に住んでいる。」

• ○彼は働｛はたら}いている。
  ×彼は勤{つと}めている。

  Again, this is because 働く means "to work" while 勤める means "to work for"/"to serve for". Hence, you use 〜で働く and 〜に勤める: 「農場で働いている。」「コンピュータ会社に勤めている。」

(Of course, as mentioned, with sufficient context you can omit arguments from the sentence.)

Thankfully you pick this sort of thing up with enough immersion -- it's sort of just like learning vocabulary (or in fact, part of learning vocabulary).

Answer 3

It's very difficult to explain because how で and に are used in your examples is a very basic usage.

In the first place, I suspect the theory that says verbs that stand for state of something take に for the locative marker, because you can easily indicate counterexamples. (In this point, I have written an article in Lang-8. http://lang-8.com/1258954/journals/147490799689691682343232488847258190894)

On the other hand, your examples with で and に switched would still not be entirely wrong, if awkward. で could be used along with 住む as in the example of 東京で家に住む.