I am just doing some homework and I can't make the sentence I want.
Concretely, I want to write
"If you start smoking again, I'm going to give you a good spanking."
If I say this in England or other parts in Europe (in a different language) the person I am telling this will laugh (or at least smile). Because of course I am not actually going to beat them up even if they start smoking again.
How can I say this in Japanese?